Getting Married

I am fourteen years old. I have always been a good girl. I had a baby girl by my pa. He told me never to tell anybody but God because it will kill my mammy. My pa took my baby while I was sleeping kilt it out in the woods. Then I had another baby a boy this time, but I don't think he kilt it, I think he sold it to a man and his wife over at Monticello. My pa come home with a girl from round Gray. She be my age but they married. My little sister Nettie has a boyfriend in the same shape as Pa. His wife died. She was kilt by her boyfriend coming home from church. My daddy beat me today because he say I winked at a boy in church. I may have got something in my eye but I didn't wink. Mr.____ always looking at Nettie now I tell her to marry Mr._____. Have one good year out of your life. After that, I know she big. A girl at church say you get big if you bleed every month. I don't bleed no more. Mr._____ finally came right out and ask for Nettie's hand in marriage. He say she too young, no experience. My Pa told him that I was ugly but I wasn't a stranger of hard work and I was clean. He told him I was oldest so I should marry first( I was 20 at this time.) He could do whatever he wanted with me and I wasn't about to have him feed it or clothe it. It took him the whole spring from March to June, to make up his mind to take me. All I thought about was Nettie. The first time I got big Pa took me out of school. He never cared that I loved it. He told me I was too dumb to keep going to school and that Nettie was the clever one in the bunch. Mr._____came back to get a good look at me and before I knew it I was married to Mr.______.